Tuesday, October 25, 2011


Today was Mom's funeral. I feel like I spent the day in the middle of a whirlwind. A lot of people came. A. Lot. Including two of my aunts from Indiana brought by my cousin and her husband, and another cousin and her husband from down near Milwaukee. I was flabbergasted to see them, and it was the only time I was in danger of breaking down. The service was lovely, a lot of warm and funny memories of Mom were shared, mostly the family went to Titletown Brewing afterwards for appetizers and more visiting, and it rained the whole time. It even hailed a bit and thundered too. Crazy. After everyone left the "reception" the family went to Mom's apartment and talked through who wants what. Mom would have been so proud of us, we didn't fight one bit. We noshed on deli trays for supper, looked at pictures, and laughed. It was a warm family time and I'm very proud of us too. We've still got a crapload of work to do to clear out her apartment but we've made a start. I'm sorry I've been such a downer these last four days (FOUR???? It's only been four days since she died??? No wonder I can't wrap my mind around it yet.) but, again, I feel as if I've been living in the middle of a whirlwind since that phone call on Saturday morning. The craziest thing was that the two largest floral arrangements were blocks of oasis in a cage on a wire easel. We had to take the whole things home with us. In order to not have them hulking around in our already crowded living room DD and I pulled out the flowers and filled Mason jars and vases. I kind of felt like I was in the winner's circle at the track when we first got home. Surreal, but then pretty much everything about the last four days has been surreal.

October 24--Winslow Homer, Palm Tree, Nassau. The land was barely higher than the sea. When storms blew ashore Lucy waited for a huge wave to come and wash right over the island. She could imagine it so easily that some nights when storms lurked on the horizon, their lightning illuminating the cloud banks. she lay awake listening to the palm fronds rattling and the thud of falling coconuts. Her house was near enough to the beach that the sounds of the surf were ever present. Some stormy nights the waves didn't pound and she found their silence more frightening than when the breaking waves shook the house.

I'd like to be on a beach tonight listening to the waves instead of here where it's cold and rainy.

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