Wednesday, March 7, 2012

Hot! Hot! Hot!

Okay, maybe it's not going to be exactly hot, but definitely warm. It's supposed to get up to 55 degrees today. In Green Bay, WI. In early March. La Nina, El Nino, I don't remember which this year but we are having a winter for the record books. All of that lovely snow that Snowstorm Crystal dumped on us last weekend? Going, going, gone. Last night when I carried the trash to the curb it was 45 degrees--at 10 PM. I will say that Porter's, um, DS & DIL1's backyard is a soupy mess and our patio looks like ice-out on a pond. Sloppy, wet, muddy and messy. But warm. I'm sure we'll have at least one more wet, heavy snow and flirt with freezing temps a few times before actual Spring sets in, but this is a strange one. Is anyone else bothered by the fact that Daylight Savings Time arrives next Saturday night/Sunday morning? You know that means that I'll be waking up in the dark, right? I don't like waking up in the dark. It's hard for me to haul my fat ass out of the warm bed in the dark--unless I'm, like, heading to the airport to fly off to Bonaire, then I can vault out of bed, dark or no dark--but this need to get up in the dark-ish just to go to work is too hard on me. Too hard. (Aren't I an excellent complainer? Creative too, I think. I can shift my focus on a dime and complain about anything. Just watch this space.) And I think I should get to stay home so I can play with my new fabric and make a bunch more lap duvets. I went off to both local fabric stores (oh dear, I missed Hobby Lobby, I don't think of them when I'm looking for fabric, I'll have to rectify that) looking for muted striped flannel and tonal linen. Didn't find it. Instead I found $1.99/yd. flannel in interesting prints (to my great surprise, not all kid prints) and 30% off linen blends in coordinating colors. Well, colors that I decree coordinate, anyway. Now I'd like to be down there duvet-ing away, working on my nearly-completed Monster Pouch for the swap, and getting to work on the March quilt blocks. Then there's the little knitted and felted bowls I found a pattern for and started knitting the first one last night. See? I have wayyy too much fun stuff to do to waste my time working. Can't forget the paycheck though. I'd better go. Mrs. Boss is real narrow-minded about only paying me if I show up. I told you, narrow-minded. She's actually quite insistent about the whole "pay for work" thing. I don't get it, I just don't get it. I would totally pay me not to show up. Totally. Okay, I agree I can take my knitting with me and I could take the fabric to lay out on the big tables in the back room and get them cut and pinned. Hmm, that's an excellent idea, Barbara. You are a genius. I think I just made a brilliant discovery--if I complain enough inspiration arrives to shut me up. Brilliant. Moving on.

March 6--Hans Memling, The Annunciation. Okay, this Hans guy wasn't all that good at drawing people. His Mary looks about seven feet tall and weighs maybe a hundred pounds. And she's already big-pregnant. Over her head is the requisite halo and a dove. I would not want a dove flying around in my bedroom and Mary does not look thrilled. In fact she looks like she's about to pass out. The archangel has a pair of helper angels along and they're the ones keeping Mary upright. One of them is looking straight out of the canvas as if to say "what're you looking at?" Not a very friendly look on his face either. I think if some guy claiming to be the Angel Gabriel just popped into my room to tell me I was pregnant when I wasn't married I'd probably feel a little lightheaded myself.

And that concludes Snark Fest for today. Thank you for your patience, I'll be here all week.

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